12.54pm I get out of bed after laying there awake for an hour. this was a depressing start if you ask me. I made my way to the kitchen and made coffee, drank it in the sunroom while i had a smoke. i thought about how everyone i know right now is looking for something, just like me. we are all at a point where we are searching for different things, all resembling a fresh start at something. i hope we all find it. talked on the phone for a while, a conversation i was anxious about that ended better than i thought. the sky was completely grey, dark clouds sitting on rooftops. the wind shook my little sun-room-haven and howled through the windows. i put on socks, black pants, white hoodie with my grey sweatshirt over top and read some more of Breakfast of Champions.
4.07 Bea comes home. we have a smoke and talk about our days. i realized this is how my mom must feel when the kids get home from school. i wanted company and was excited when bea's car pulled up. my dad tells me he likes my new hair, and i know he meant it cause my mom hadnt had the chance to tell him to yet. this is when the wind gets quieter, the clouds melt into the sky and the sun lightens up everything. i put on some Florence and the Machine and smoke some weed.
lets see how the weather holds up.
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